How to make money and be hated by many

(Re-post from old site on May 30,2010)

Pundit, pundit!  Why haven’t I doned it?  I often find myself explaining the ins and outs of politics to other people, people who mostly don’t care a hang about what I’m saying or who think I’m nuts for saying what I say.  And all of this wisdom and entertainment I dispense for free.  But why?  Why go to all the trouble for people who are going to dismiss you as a nobody or are going to immediately hate you as a bigot or hate monger because you disagree with them.  Why, heck, if people are going to abjectly hate me anyway, then I should give them plenty for which to hate me.  And I should be compensated.  Rush Limbaugh gets millions.  Glen Beck has his own tv show to go with the radio and writing gigs.  Why not me?

 

I’ve been around the block a few times.  I’ve lived through 11 presidents, a quarter of USA history, the cold war, the end of the cold war, Vietnam, Gulf Wars, Grenada, Nicaragua,  Mao, Deng Jiao Ping, glasnost, race riots, Phyllis Diller.  I’m not really well-versed in leftist writings, but I could become so if I had time and funding to do so.  I had the quintessential liberal arts education, can speak my way around the world, know where the Congo is, don’t have Russia in my back yard.  I even have a lot of personal scandals to deny, such as being a closet libertarian (or not so closet).  And, I like to jabber on all day.  I listen to Rush et al, and the main thing that strikes me is that they can say so much about so little.  But I can do it even better.  Except that I talk so fast that I can cover more ground.  I guess it would take a little time to become adept at actually listening to callers.  But maybe I wouldn’t need callers.  Anyway, I don’t want yes-people.  So I’d probably just take calls from the ones that hate me and tell me that all hate-mongering bigots like me should be flogged and shot.

Look at my picture.  I’m a perfect profile of the pundit, all sharply dressed in my fine suit and sipping the best champagne (actually hardly ever drink and hate ties).  Imagine the fun they will have when I start talking about Obama the fascist, or Bush the fascist (although Bush was only a compassionate conservative fascist, compared to Obama’s overt Marxist fascism, ).  I could maybe even educate some people.  Of course, they’d just call me a parrot, which is true of everyone who reads books and learns from the opinions of others.  How can you know anything without reading about it, unless you were there yourself?  But I don’t need to have met ML King to know that he wasn’t a Christian.  I just need to read what he said.  And you won’t need to know me to know that I know what I’m saying is true.  You just need to read what I say.  For now, I say that the battery is low and not at home, so it’s time to wrap it up.

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